This truth...such a novel idea. It changes with authors. Believed or not by consumers. But such a big word. So much filling its curves and crosses. TRUTH Everyone has their own. Shaped and baked by lifetimes of ovens. Some hot and steamy and uncomfortable. Some freshly cleaned and not even turned on. But make no mistake, these "ovens" of our lives are our own. Even those who live through the experiences with us do not, cannot, have the same truth. 

There is a lot of anger in my truth, right now. Since 2015 I have watched with revulsion. Watched the Republican Party that I grew up in become some kind of cult. Where if you have a opposing thought, you will be banished and lives destroyed. As each fresh hell came out, I wondered how the hell we got here. As more and more people jumped on the orange train, I became more dismayed. Are they not hearing what I am? How are they processing the racist, belittling comments of TFG? Or....did he just give them the permission they have been waiting for? To be as racist and ugly against anyone that doesn't look or think as the group. And as 2015 became the election year, 2016 and I horrifyingly watched people throw away their decency, morals, and intellect and vote that orange clown in to the presidency, I thought (hoped) he would take on the mantle of a civilized, respectful world leader. WRONG, WRONG, WRONG, WRONG, WRONG, WRONG, WRONG, WRONNNNNNGGGGGG. 4 years of out right lies and bullying. Not a policy that benefitted any American that wasn't already benefitting from a "trickledown" economy.

But I think the worst is that after 4 years and a failed re election, the idea that racism is ok has been fueled to the point of never ending. Just like when Bill Clinton made blow jobs ok, TFG makes it ok to be a full on racist. Now it spreads to the state legislators. Bills restricting votes are the new lynch mobs. The fact that more than 35% of TFG supporters won't take the vaccine makes me hurt for the soul of the country. It's these 35% that will keep us in pandemic mode; allow variants to mutate and to eventually defeat the vaccine. And then, we are surrounded by the politicians and tv show hosts that do nothing but perpetuate lies of stolen elections, unnecessary vaccines, etc. Why are there no limits to how they spread the disinformation. Admitted they are not "news" but opinion shows, yet they have press credentials? Make them what they are, talk shows for entertainment. Not to be taken as facts. Where is the cavalry to stop them. Politicians flocking to florida to kiss the ass of TFG. Not even visiting their own districts. Covering up January 6. Who the fuck says it's ok to recount ballots months after the election has been certified? What kind of power does this fucktified party have that they can order this shit? Angry. 

And then there are corporate donations. As they walk away from the idea of not supporting the elected officials that voted against the certification, they slowly, quietly try to slip them $$ on the side. But as consumers, how can we fight it? EVERY company donates to political candidates. On both sides. So where does a consumer find products that align with their own ideals? They don't. It's hit or miss. ATT is a slippery donor, but so are the other telecoms. So do you go without a cellular phone or a lesser service? Its a mess.  

And then...I am sad

Why did they cancel Sports Night? Peter Krause, Felicity Huffman, Josh Charles, Josh Malina...2 seasons from 1998 thru 2000.  Funny, smart, thoughtful. It got a rough deal from ABC, but it's getting me through right now. God, I love this show. A show about producing an ESPN style show that minimally has to do with sports. Life, Relationships and sports...  Look it up someday. Even though the first season has a laugh track, still funny as hell. It must be karma that I have both seasons with me today. Watching it, each 22 minute episode, having it in my head through the earbuds,  has lifted my spirits. Why do I need my spirit lifed?
Is today your first day?!
Its the day after. At least this year I made it into work. There have been seasons that have been more devastating emotionally. Earlier exits after stronger seasons. I remember an exit the night before Mother's Day. Spent the day pouting in bed. Just wanted to be left alone and family obliged.
Did we really want a championship for a half season? A season with an *. I have been mad as hell because they blew a 2 game lead and had so many chances to close and didn't get it done. I have been hopeful for next season. Taking out the 2nd seed and going to game 7  with the 1st seed, who still needed overtime to win, shows a lot of promise. The rookies made mistakes but they contributed more. They will be more than ready come September training camp.  And then, so will I.  So, are you MAD or HOPEFUL?
GO KINGS!

It's the Playoffs, Damnit!

And then...this is IT! In or Out! Hockey or Golf! As it has been with the entire season for the Detroit Red Wings, the roller coaster ride continues...I got so hopeful during games 2, 3 & 4...outstanding skating, puck responsibility and Jimmy Howard standing tall. Games 5 & 6 are a shadow of those earlier games.  Third period implosions don't win series. Only a team as talented the Detroit Red Wings can blow 2 and 3 goal leads/2 game leads. Gotta keep it interesting...on the edge of our f'n minds. And then,  the Refs don't like Detroit, never have. I may even be one of those conspiracy theory DRW fans, but they never fail to disprove the theory. A penalty shot? For f'n real..on a play that was no doubt a penalty but in no way an offense worthy of a f'n PENALTY SHOT! Datsyuk in the box in the last 3 minutes of a 1 goal game...Mtherfkrs.....on a grab that has been going on for the entire history of hockey. Referees hate Detroit.

Its always the innocent that suffer...my innocent are my kids. Especially with the Pacific time zone games. Hard to sleep with mom yelling (elated or cursing) at 1 in the morning. Also a little harder to concentrate with no mind...lunch accounts go empty, sandwiches are dinner (better than cereal), did I forget your birthday candles this year?...so sorry, Wings are up 2 games and I can't believe I remembered the balloons.

#BELIEVE has been my little word ritual for this team. A team that was decimated by retirements and other player losses.Then the injuries piled up and the Griffins got called up one by one and made their marks. Now it's the 2nd round of the Western Conference in the NHL and we are still in it. Crazy but true. Most didn't have Detroit making the playoffs this year which would have been a tragedy for Zetterberg. 2nd Round....Game 7....against the President Trophy winners. I want so much to #Believe.
Head and Heart goin at it...Reality against Miracles Happen...I can't say that going into Chicago is going to be what we wanted. So much better to finish them off on Monday, but the "Third Period Other Team Miracle" seems to be making an appearance.That f'n arena is going to be on FIRE! We know the importance of a strong crowd so our best bet is to take them out quick.. Big hits by Kronwall and Abby, keep Howard bored, and SCORE early and often.
So take a deep breath, keep your eyes on the puck And Then...
GO WINGS!

finally...maybe this will help

Basics...a 47ish mexican american mom of 3 girls (12 (violin, flute, baseball), 15(soccer, drama, band), 21) living in the western wayne county subs, live and die with the Detroit Red Wings, hockey such an amazing sport, requires so much more skill than other sports and it keeps MOVING! Hate baseball for the very reason that you have a little action but most of the time you're WAITING for something to happen. sucks...Back to basics, married over 20 years to BeatTheTrain, Andy. Lots of people may know him, he is semi famous. He's a spin instructor at LA Fitness, Allen Park on Monday and Livonia on Tues/Thurs. He does have a few groupies, but mostly people who enjoy his style. Work in the county government for the paycheck/benes/vacation time but I help manage a ballet folklorico dance group that the girls dance/teach with. I also am a TV show snob...I love/hate television...I get hooked on shows that are inevitably dismissed because they are too good and interesting for the american veiwing public who continue to make honey boo boo a show to be watched...a topic for another day or 3. Which is seriously why I thought to start this blog...so much to vent...so here we go...

im in a vicisious cycle....no energy to workout leaves me with no energy...shit. I love my xbox kinect game YourShape:Fitness Evolved 2012 and I have been getting up at 5am ish to get a good 45 min to an 1hour in before work for almost 2 years, but this week has left me with no motiviation. its always hard in the month of may. hockey, 3 birthdays, cinco de mayo performances, sports schedules all collide with each other AND THEN rolls over the regular chaos of everyday. no dinners made only  bought or whipped together from boxes and cans, shopping lists written in dust on the tables and tvs, floors even the dog wont lick only laundry is getting any attention and only because people need clean underwear. got some dishes done and a little order back yesterday but the piles are lurking in the bedrooms since i merely shifted the crap from one room to another...my go to stragegy for feeling like i have accomplished something, one room looks pretty good while you close the doors of the other.
i got to get back on track need a super strong workout with my yourshape for kinect. 3 wallbreakers, 1 extreme toning, full cardio boxing class and full yoga!! Saturday morning is the goal  before i take bell to relay for life. Got to get back into the rhythm. I can really feel how it has changed me over the last couple of years.  Since I graduated high school I have not done anything physical. More couch potato than anything. mostly because the pregnancy weight came off on its own. But got the kinect for the kids, picked up the exercise game for no reason. kids used kinect a little for the dance games but once i realized I didnt want to waste 300 bucks, I started using the exersise game. All I can say is...FUN! & HOOKED. Been doing it for a while, still love it. Maybe gonna add Nike training for kinect. It has really changed my energy for the better and this week feels like it used to. Sluggish and irritated. The late night hockey is killing me. Bring on the Eastern Conference! Then we only have to see that time zone in the FINALS!!!

Completely switching brain levels, maybe Mario can cut and color my hair...I should call him. I haven't colored my hair for at least 15 years. Its always been a beautiful brown, grey free. Recently saw a friend who noticed the increasing grey. Sad for me..so here I go to join the old people in denial.

Ok, so i will try to get the ideas and thoughts off my soul onto this page and sometimes it might even be a little clever, a little humorous or downright shit. And then...